You Should Have Known Your Grandfather

Yesterday, Sam and I rode together to a more distant grocery store, in search of more tomatillos than we could expect to find on the shelves of the Brookside Market. We listened to my music way too loud, and I observed that his inability to appreciate arena rock (Def Leppard, "Photograph") mirrored my own inability to appreciate my father's Glen Miller.

Probably it was just the lingering sentimentality of listening to Slaid Cleaves, but the thought struck me. It's been 17 years since he died and a quarter century since he had the stroke that stole his words and took my real father away. I still miss him painfully, though less frequently as the years pass.

Yesterday, though, I felt the stab that my children never really knew him. The stroke had rendered him awkwardly speechless before they were born, and their memories of him are strained and almost nonexistent. Ali remembers him playfully trying to take her teddy bear, and being kind of frightened. She would have been 3.

I have a photo of Dad holding Sam as a baby. Sam is stretching to get off his lap and on to some adventure, and Dad is holding him with his one good arm and smiling warmly.

I see my marks on my children. They are random and essential. Some of them I'm happy to pass on, and others are quirks a more generous geneticist than God would have opted not to extend.

The best stuff, though, comes from my father to them. I see Dad's Irish sense of humor in them both. In Sam I see his love of words and language. In Ali, I see his ability to understand people at a deeper level - to look through the behavior of the moment and ponder what makes people tick. In both of them, I see a work ethic and acceptance that the world was not designed to make things easy for them, though it has plenty of joy if they accept it. They both received his slow temper.

My father knew me. He could spend hours discussing pacifism with me, or baseball, or work. He knew my siblings, too, and treated us all individually. I never felt like I had to conform to his interests - he was willing to adapt to my own. His pride in our achievements was sunshine, and his patience with our shortcomings was tolerance, but never acceptance.

Time did not allow my children to know my father. They would have loved him, and he would have loved them. Stuck between their generations, I see how both would have grown and thrived in that absent opportunity, and I realize how amazingly lucky I am to have had such a father, and such children.

I Am Rubber, You Are Glue . . .

Yesterday, within the course of less than 12 hours, I got called a "commie" by a Russian Jew, and I got compared to Hitler by a guy whose father was literally a member of the Hitler Youth. In less than a half day, I managed to cover pretty much the entire negative spectrum of 20th Century political thought.

Charlie Bit Me!

Just for grins - 'tis the season to be jolly after all . . .



And another baby appreciates the humor of golf . . .

Blogger Background on Bhutto

Yesterday's sad insanity is completely out of context for the vast majority of Americans, and I am very much among the ignorant. I know very little about Pakistan's history, or current state. Hullabaloo provides a "Pakistan Crisis for Dummies" post and Juan Cole provides deeper analysis.

Ballroom Dancing In the Olympics?

In yet another assault on all that is decent and traditional, the International Olympic Committee is considering adding Ballroom Dancing, a/k/a DanceSport (no, I'm not kidding) to the Olympics roster. Just what the world needs - another "sport" without a ball, without a goal, but with a panel of judges.

The problem is rooted in a misunderstanding of the difference between sport and other hard activities. The IOC looks at several factors to decide whether an activity can be considered an Olympic sport - among them are physical strenuousness, history and tradition, popularity and cost. Also, a big plus for "DanceSport" (yes, I smirked as I typed that) is that it has gender equity built in, since the heterocentric norms of the activity require that teams consist of one of each gender.

If you're going to include activities based on physical strenuousness, history, tradition, popularity and cost, why not include the marching band tuba player? What about roofing? Rolling out dough for quiche?

It's remarkably simple - real sports don't have subjective judges. Sure, tennis might have a line judge, but that's just a referee, there to decide what really happened. You don't see judges awarding points to tennis players because their form was perfect, or because they really captured the spirit of the crowd. Even ugly tennis players get calls going their way, unlike in gymnastics.

Ballroom dancing is not a sport. Ice dancing, figure skating, diving, gymnastics and equestrian dressage are not sports. They are activities, all of which are far beyond this writer's abilities, but so are sewing, playing the flute, and speaking French. All these activities are fine pursuits, but they are not sports.

Sports have real scores - scores that keep track of objective things. Did the ball go through the hoop, between the uprights, or over the fence? While, on occasion, there may be some dispute as to whether those things actually happened, the point of the sport is to make them happen. And artistry isn't the point, or even relevant, except as a means to the end. Nobody gives points to a quarterback who throws a great spiral if it's not caught. Nobody cares if a pitcher lands gracefully.

There are no gray areas if you focus on objective scoring, though there are a few areas where the scoring may be so difficult as to allow subjectivity to creep in. Olympic boxing is a sport in its ideal, but judges are given such a difficult task in deciding whether a punch was landed or blocked that some inadvertent subjectivity is bound to occur. The point, though, is that a punch is a punch, not an artistic statement.

Similarly, it would be possible to create real sports out of many of the pseudo-sports that infest the Olympics. How high can the ice dancer throw his partner? Put bars up for them to clear. How far can they jump? How long can they spin without vomiting? Note that the entertainment of these activities would actually increase if they were converted to real sports!

The Olympic Motto is "Swifter, Higher, Stronger". The ancient Greeks didn't seek "Prettier, Perkier, More Graceful". We've already slid way too far down the slope of sports that Dick Button can gush about without adding ballroom dancing to the menu.

More Than I Need

The day before yesterday, I had more stuff than I thought I needed, and today it's the same, though more so. Into the wall of my material satisfaction, though, those who love me stuffed the spackle of gifts into cracks I didn't know I had. New slippers to replace a torn and stained pair. A beer mug selected for me in the land of the Magyars, and brought to me by a daughter who has grown subtly and vastly since she left our home. Books carefully chosen to reflect an enduring commonality with a son who is growing up and away. A saltine-sized piece of miracle from my wife that will liven my days with music. Wine from friends to warm celebrations and meals.

I hope you each had a wonderful Holiday Season, whether it was centered on Christmas or Hanukkah or a different Holiday or no Holiday at all.

The only thing further I could hope for is something to write about tomorrow. That would be nice.

Merry Christmas, Conservatives!

Here at Casa Gonemild, we've had a peaceful Christmas, complete with nativity scenes and family time. We had dinner with Johnson County Republicans, and had too much great food and not a word of politics. A lot of well-chosen books were exchanged around our Christmas tree, other fun stuff, and a new guitar player will soon be adding music to the world.

I was wryly amused by the people who sought to use "Merry Christmas" as "fighting words" agsinst to liberals. Yes, they thought that they could somehow use Jesus' birthday as a political weapon.

From the bottom of my heart, I wish those people peace on earth, and good will to men (and women).

Contentment

Yesterday, we received a call telling us that our daughter's trip home from Budapest was going to face a major delay, and that she wouldn't arrive until today. They were wrong - she made her flight in DC by a feat of jet-lagged athleticism through a crowded airport, and today has been a quiet day of delightfully mundane activities, capped with everyone working together to make tamales.

Life is good, and I wish everyone well.

Hobbies

My friend over at Beneath the Ginko has been writing lovingly about his hobby - painting miniature figurines. To me, the hobby holds little to no interest, but it's kind of fun to read about because his enthusiasm rings through.

Every now and then, when I'm stuck making small talk with someone, I'll ask if they have any hobbies. Invariably, they need to think a moment before answering, which is completely understandable, because most hobbyists don't think of what they do as a hobby. "Hobby" somehow sounds like a distraction - an amusement to fill time. A "hobby" sounds frivolous - but, for a real hobbyist, a hobby is a part of who they are. A few months ago, after spending an evening fishing, I wrote:

fishing, for me, has the three attributes of what I consider a "true" hobby - something that requires complete concentration, an unattainable level of skill, and doesn't really matter.

All three are crucial. Complete concentration takes you away from everything else. Work, home, people, issues, everything melts away until you're there, in the moment, just a guy working a fly rod. The skill level required needs to be beyond you - partially to assist with the complete concentration part, but also to keep you working toward something near perfection. I wish I could say this in smaller, more modest language, but it's a way of brushing up against that other dimension, be it God, infinity, or some unifying force, that stirs and quietly thrills a part of me that can't be dormant.

Finally, it can't really matter in the day-to-day sense. It has to be pure - something done for its own sake. Most of what we do is, in some way, about impacting the world. Our work, our politics, our conversations, our philanthropy - they're all a way of asserting our presence in the world - remaking the world in some small way to better accommodate us. But a pure hobby does not really impact the world in such a manner. It places you "in" the world, instead of somehow with or against it.

What shocks me, though, is that some people, if you ask them their hobby, will assure you that they don't have one. "I'm too busy for a hobby," they assert.

I hope those people really do have a hobby, but they either don't realize it or they are too embarrassed to admit it. Perhaps they cannot associate the trivial word "hobby" with their passion for studying, collecting and displaying arrowheads. Perhaps that person spends hours whittling intricate sculptures out of ivory soap, but doesn't want to share such a deep passion with me, a virtual stranger. Perhaps, as a philatelist, s/he does not want to face the indignity of listening to me claim "Yeah, I used to collect stamps when I was a kid. I had a banana shaped stamp from Tonga! Do you have one of those?"

I look at myself, and I have lots of hobbies, at various stages of activity. (Blogging doesn't count, since it doesn't fit my definition of a hobby very well.) Some of my hobbies have been dormant for years, but I still feel close to them, and fully expect to dive back into them at some stage of my life that offers more leisure. Here's a list that comes to mind quickly: golf (I'm a terrible golfer, but I have fun), watercolor painting, philately (pre-1945 US and Germany, with an emphasis in postal stationery, covers, and postal history), homebrewing, cooking, reading fiction, writing, and learning about jazz.

I'm curious about what other hobbies are represented out there. Commenters, what hobbies enrich your life?

99 Bottles of Beer on the Blog - Sinister Rabbit

A while back, I wrote a fair but scathing review of Mac's Beer, brewed by the folks over at Flying Monkey Brewery. 6 weeks or so ago, I found a beer tasting station at Lukas Liquors, and they were pouring a different Flying Monkey effort, and I gave it "Roadtrip Brewing Sinister Rabbit Ale" a try. Tonight, with the snow and sleet flying, I popped the top off of one and it's still a pretty darned respectable beer.

The key to this beer is hop bitterness. It's a porter (though I think the sample dude told me it was a stout). The aroma is coffee, with a touch of maltiness. The color is dark brown, almost black, topped with a classic tan head of an all-malt porter. From the aroma, you'd expect something rich and sweet like St. Bridget's Robust Porter.

And then the hop bitterness hits. The maltiness is still there, but the sharpness of hops transforms it into something different and distinctive.

Hops can do three different things in a beer. They can add aroma, they can add flavor, and they can add bitterness. In this one, it's all about the bitterness. If you want aroma and flavor and bitterness, try Sam Adams Hallertauer Imperial Pilsner, but Sinister Rabbit has little hop aroma, not much hop flavor, and a healthy dose of hop bitterness.

Bitter doesn't sound that good, I suppose, but it's not set-your-teeth-on-edge bitterness, it's sharp and interesting bitter. It's like how a sharp cheddar is better than Velveeta. It's like how dark chocolate is better than milk chocolate. This is a great beer that will stand up to and enhance rich foods, and cut through sauces.

I love the porter style and this is a good example, with its own unique personality. Lots of breweries make rich, sweet, malty porters, and I enjoy those as well. But Sinister Rabbit stretches the envelope toward the bitter side, and it's a welcome addition to the world of porter. On top of that, it's brewed locally, so it deserves your attention when you see it in the beer aisle.

What's a 9 letter word for "frustration"?

On this date in 1913, the New York World published the first crossword puzzle.

Twilight Zone Meme

Xavier Onassis over that Hip Suburban White Guy tagged me with the Twilight Zone Meme, which directs that you write about a "paranormal event" you have experienced. I normally hate memes and ignore them, because they are the blogging equivalent of chain emails, and almost invariably demand a self-indulgent, narcissistic recounting of things nobody would ever get around to asking someone else. I'm fully capable of being self-indulgent and narcissistic without anyone else's assistance . . .

Anyhow, in a moment of weakness, I agreed to participate in this one. When I agreed, I was feeling kind of boxed in to political writing, and thought the meme would help shift my focus. Also, XO wrote a heck of a great post with a touching story about the birth of his daughter, and I hoped I could write something approaching it.

Nope. I've got nothing.

I don't have a single story that reflects anything "paranormal" in my life. No visits from dead relatives, no spooky premonitions, no visions of the future. (My uncanny political predictions are all based on incredible judgment and insight, not messages from the heavens, believe it or not.)

And that absence strikes me as a little weird, when I think about it. But not paranormal.

Matt Blunt Makes a Great Choice

I'm surprised and pleased by Matt Blunt today. He appointed Alok Ahuja to the Missouri Court of Appeals for the Western District to fill the spot created when he put Judge Patricia Breckenridge on the Missouri Supreme Court. I have known Alok for years, and he is widely recognized as one of the smartest and most thoughtful attorneys in town. He embodies what an appellate judge ought to be - incredibly smart, rigorously analytical, and intellectually creative.

While I am sure that Governor Blunt was influenced by the Republican connections of the Lathrop & Gage law firm, including "Mr. Kansas City" Jack Craft and a young woman by the name of Amy Blunt, I take my hat off to Governor Blunt for stepping outside the bitter partisanship that has lately surrounded judicial appointments, and appointing the best person for the job, even though that person happens to be a (very moderate) Democrat.

Wow.

I am sincerely impressed with Governor Blunt tonight.

And pleased for Alok, and the state of our Judiciary.

AG Candidate Donnelly Loses Case & Presumption of Legal Skill?

I was surprised when AG Candidate Margaret Donnelly filed a lawsuit challenging the secrecy of the Missouri Ethics Commission hearings. Even though I share the politically voyeuristic urge to see who is seeking to argue hardship and hold onto their large campaign donations, the statute creating the Missouri Ethics Commission seems awfully clear that it is an exempted from the Sunshine Law.

If the case had merit, I figured that Jeff Harris, who has actually served as an Assistant Missouri Attorney General working with Attorney General Jay Nixon, would have gotten involved. He knows the law a lot better than Donnelly does, so when he opted not to get on board, I figured that he knew the ship was going to sink.

It did.

Sadly, Donnelly is going to keep banging her head on the wall. “This is the first step in a long process,” she said. “I’m going forward because I think people are fed up with government operating behind closed doors." I agree with her that people would like to know more about the hearings.

But curiosity is not a cause of action, and wishing the law were written differently is not a winning argument.

Margaret Donnelly decided to demonstrate her legal acumen during her campaign, and now we all get to see what the courts think of her arguments.

As I wrote before, I met Margaret Donnelly and was unimpressed with her political judgment. Now that I've seen her legal judgment, I'm equally unimpressed.

Thank God we have Jeff Harris in the race.

What I Want for Christmas

Though my backyard might not be deep enough to avoid blotches on the neighbor's house.

What to Get at Manny's?

I'm asking for a little help here. Lunch today is going to be at Manny's, the venerable Southwest Boulevard institution. I need to regain my strength after last night's Missouri Plan Marathon.

The only problem is that I've never really enjoyed a meal at Manny's. I've always walked out of there stuffed, but feeling like the food had come from a Johnson County mall food court. I haven't had anything that approaches what I would get at any of my personal Mexican Food Fantastic Four - Pancho's on Main, Rudy's Tenampa Taqueria, La Fonda El Taquito, and Midtown Burritos and More.

Any suggestions, Manny's fans?

The Complete Honest Truth About the Missouri Plan

I had a friendly conversation with a journalist a while back, and the topic briefly turned to the Missouri Plan. "Can't you make the Missouri Plan interesting?", I asked her. She shook her head no.

Today, I had an email exchange with a journalist who covers the courts, and his confusion about the Missouri plan was as complete as it could be, but it was innocent confusion. He really didn't understand some of the basic points, and, in his confusion, he had some very flawed perceptions.

What follows is my attempt to lay it all out. If the topic bores you, skip this post. It's not a particularly fun topic, and any honest analysis, as this one will be, cannot help but be complex and qualified. I'm not going to make strident points or state my opinions more forcefully than they deserve solely to win rhetorical points.

And I'm not going to allow comments on this one post. If you have honest questions or you want clarification on something, email me and I will do my best to respond. If you find a factual error, please email me and I will make any necessary correction. But I'm not going to allow half-baked conspiracy theorists or unstable, misguided souls to turn this into a cacophony of lies and half-truths. If you disagree with some of my conclusions or opinions, I wish you the best in finding another soapbox.

What is the Missouri Plan for Judicial Selection?

The Missouri Plan is a system for selection of judges and deciding whether they should hold onto their offices. Some call it the Missouri Non-Partisan Court Plan, but I prefer the simpler and less confusing "Missouri Plan", as there is plenty of partisanship in any system of judicial selection. Missouri has three levels of state courts - the trial courts (Circuit Courts), the Appellate Courts (divided into 3 districts), and the Supreme Court.

The Trial Courts: Most trial judges in Missouri are elected. They participate in regular elections, with campaign signs and the whole kit and kaboodle. But, because they are only judges for a particular circuit (usually 2 or 3 counties - it depends on population), the campaigns are relatively modest affairs. You don't see massive TV budgets or major campaign contributions. Many, or most, local lawyers donate to both sides in a close race.

It's important to recall that there are a lot of other judges in Missouri that are not part of the Missouri Plan. Federal judges make a lot of headlines, but they get appointed under the Federal system, with its Senate approval process. Federal judges get lifetime appointments, and face no retention elections. There are also municipal judges - employed by municipalities to handle traffic tickets and ordinance violations. The systems for choosing them vary widely - the Kansas City judge who got caught taking loans from lawyers was not a Missouri Plan judge.

In St. Louis City and Jackson, Platte, Clay and St. Louis Counties, the judges are chosen through the Missouri Plan. The last three listed changed to the Missouri Plan in the 1970s, when the voters chose to forego elections. In each of the Missouri Plan circuits, judicial nominations are made commissions composed of the chief judge of the court of appeals district in which the circuit is located, plus two lawyers elected by the bar and two citizens selected by the governor. Thus, three of the panelists (the appellate judge and the citizens) are chosen by governors at one point or another, and two are selected by lawyers.

Appellate Courts: There are three Courts of Appeals in Missouri. One covers the Eastern and Northeastern counties and normally meets in St. Louis, one covers the Western and Northwestern counties and normally meets in Kansas City, and one covers the Southern part of the state, and normally meets in Springfield. Appellate judges don't try cases - they read briefs, listen to oral arguments, and write opinions.

The Supreme Court is the highest court in Missouri. Most of its work is reviewing cases where the one of the Appellate Courts has already made a decision. If the Appellate Court was way out of line with its decision, or if the Appellate Courts issue differing rulings on the same issue, then the Supreme Court might choose to take a case and issue a ruling.

The nominations for the Courts of Appeals and the Supreme Court are made by a commission composed of three lawyers elected by lawyers, three citizens selected by the governor, and the chief justice, who serves as chair. Each of the geographic districts of the Court of Appeals must be represented by one lawyer and one citizen member on the Appellate Judicial Commission. The elections for the lawyers are low-key affairs, with most of the campaigning taking the form of simple letters written by the candidate or his or her supporters and mailed to lawyers in the district. There's not any fundraising or aggressive campaigning - the lawyers elected are generally people who have built up a good name among their fellow attorneys. I've never seen a lawyer mention a party affiliation in his or her mailings.

Each of the commissions comes up with a panel of three nominees, and the governor gets to choose one of them (if he doesn't, the commission gets to do it). The commission is where a lot of the magic happens. I wish I could claim that the commission makes its choices solely on merit, regardless of polltics or influence, but that would be a lie.

If it's not all merit, what else is there? Well, part of it is definitely political connections. But it's kind of funny - you don't want to be too political. 95% of the time, it's best to be someone who's worked on a few campaigns in the background, but nobody too controversial. You want to be the sort of person that, should you make the panel of three that gets submitted to the governor, you'll have a few friends who are well-connected to the governor call or write the governor on your behalf. But you don't want to be the kind of person that, should the governor select you, he will be making enemies, or creating the appearance that he has appointed a political hack.

I don't want to understate the good faith of the governors, either - including the current governors. A judicial appointment is likely to be on the bench a good long time, long after the Governor will have left office. You want to appoint people who reflect your values and will do so ably. A half-wit party hack doesn't fit that description, so governors do seek people they sincerely believe are qualified and able to persuade others that their rulings are correct.

What is the Missouri Plan for Judicial Retention?

This is pretty simple. At the first election after a newly appointed judge has served a year, s/he is put on a ballot for a simple yes or no retention. They don't have opponents, and they aren't listed by party. If they win a majority, and I don't believe anyone has lost an initial retention election, they get a full term before facing another retention election. Supreme Court and Appellate Court judges have 12 year terms, and Circuit Court (trial) judges have 6 year terms.

These are pretty bare-bones elections. Judges are bound by a judicial ethics to NOT do a lot of typical campaigning, but, on the other hand, they don't have much need to do so when they aren't facing an opponent.

The Missouri Bar and League of Women Voters distribute voter guides before retention elections, including evaluations of judges on the basis of things like fairness, legal analysis skills, diligence and decisiveness. Lawyers and jurors do the evaluations, and they often have some surprising results. I know that the judges study their results carefully, and often use them as a kind of job evaluation to identify their perceived weaknesses.

How Well Does the Selection System Work?

In my opinion, we have a fantastic bench in Missouri, and much of that is due to the Missouri Plan. I say that as someone who knows a lot of judges, has some experience in the courtroom and appellate courts, and no longer appears before judges, so I don't have a lot of incentive to pull my punches. (I should point out I've appeared in front of good elected judges in Missouri, but I've always been underwhelmed by the elected judges in other states, where the elections are high-financed affairs.)

The strength of the bench is not a figment of my Democratic leanings, either. Back when I was a young lawyer, the Missouri Supreme Court was 100% composed of appointments by John Ashcroft, and I never heard (or made) a peep complaining that we needed to change our judicial appointment system. Ray Price, as Republican a man as I have ever met, remains one of my favorite people I have ever known to put on the black robes. Judge Ann Covington was wonderful. Judge Elwood Thomas may have been the best judge in the history of the state, though sad fate prevented him from proving it. The only person I thought at the time was a weak pick on the Court, Chip Robertson, turned out to be a fine judge.

At the trial and appellate level, there have been several judges that I thought should not have been appointed. In a couple cases, my original perception remains. There are a couple judges who I think have too much of a plaintiff's orientation, and a couple I think have too much of a defendant's bias. But, despite those instances, I always felt 100% confident that the judges were playing things straight. There's never a sense in Missouri courts that "the fix is in".

How Well Does the Missouri Plan Retention System Work?

As written here before, the retention system works, though it might not feel like a "real election". I saw Judge Hutcherson get knocked off when it was deserved. Frankly, I haven't seen any other judges that deserved to lose. The selection process works, so the retention process shouldn't be generating a whole lot of heat and controversy. I heard Chip Robertson point out that the only baseball umpire that most Missourians can remember is Don Denkinger - the good umpires, like good judges, don't generate a lot of attention for themselves.

Which also raises another important factor for judges - the necessity of making unpopular decisions makes them susceptible to unfair election pressures. If you are unfairly accused of a crime, do you want to face a judge who wants to make "tough on crime" his or her campaign slogan? Similarly, is it fair to ask a judge to throw out a coerced confession in a rape case if s/he is going to be up for an election a month? Justice is not always popular, and elevating popularity as a qualification for judges in our cities will not serve the public interest.


What are the Alternatives?

That's part of the problem - the Republicans are playing hide and seek with their plans. Some advocate for more elections, some want "advice and consent" of the legislature, and some want to give the governor more opportunity to stack the commission. It's impossible for me to fairly address the benefits and weaknesses of any specific plan with any specificity.

One common thread, though, is that all the proposals I've seen increase the influence of political parties and money on the process. While that's an accepted part of the process for the other two branches, the judicial system is different. The judicial system relies on the perception of fairness to justify its existence. We accept and expect partisanship in our state house and governor's mansion, but it is anathema to the Courthouse.

Conclusion

The Missouri Plan works well as a means of selecting and retaining judges. It has served our citizens through the time of the Ascroft court and it continues to serve today. The agitation for change to the plan does not arise from any dissatisfaction with the judges on our bench. Republicans don't really want to see Judge Coe in Kansas City. But I believe that a minority of Republicans think that they can drive some uninformed voters to the polls to vote against "activist judges", and a few others sincerely believe that "democracy" is the best way to select legal specialists (though I doubt they would select heart surgeons or plumbers based on political campaigns).

As my journalist friend acknowledged, this is not a fun or interesting issue. But it is a wildly important one. Not because I particularly care about the judges themselves - they could find other jobs if they needed to. But I care deeply about whether the courts in Missouri will continue to work as well as they currently do. I worry about political consultants playing a larger role in our judicial system. I worry about losing the perception of fairness in our courts, and I worry about losing the reality of fairness.

What we have works. Every alternative being pressed by the Republican political consultants will increase the role of money, political partisanship and political consultants. I don't want to give political consultants a bigger role in our judicial system. I don't want our courthouse to resemble the City Council.

Who does?

Foul Weather Fans?

The Star today has several articles, including a teaser on the front page, about fans who continue to support the Chiefs despite their awful play this year. It's encouraging to see the Star do some hard-core investigative reporting in locating a few fans to interview - by the end of the game yesterday, Chiefs fans were as scarce at Arrowhead as college graduates at a NASCAR race.

Let's just get over the "shock" at the idea that Kansas Citians might be "fair weather fans". The derision tied to the term "fair weather fan" is nothing more than the greatest marketing concept ever developed by sports team owners. Why should anyone feel even a tiny bit sheepish about supporting a team when it's up, or abandoning a team when it's down?

Imagine if restaurant owners could achieve the same marketing mindset. "Sure, your waitress brought you rancid meat the last several times you visited, but if you don't show up next week, you're just a fair weather fan." And food columnists would question whether Kansas City really deserves good restaurants if we don't eat awful food. Other cities would brag about keeping terrible restaurants open for years, taking civic pride in their numbers of food poisoning deaths.

It is not a sign of civic softness that Arrowhead was a ghost town by the end of yesterday's miserable performance. It was a sign that the Chiefs offered up a completely unacceptable entertainment entree. Both teams were bad, and one - our home team - was awful. The real question was not "Where did the fans go?" but, instead, "What kind of freaking idiots came out here in freezing weather to watch this crap?"

The Bar Needs a New Missouri Plan

As regular readers know, I am a vocal supporter of the Missouri Plan, and I oppose the Republicans' attempts to use our system of judicial selection and retention as a wedge issue. So, let's be clear - I like our Missouri Plan.

On an unrelated issue, though, I think the Missouri Bar needs to recommit itself to Missouri and Missourians. Did you know that in late January, the Missouri Bar will be hosting an official meeting, complete with a meeting of its governing body, the Board of Governors, outside of Missouri? And not just outside Missouri, outside of the United States!

Allow me to quote from the Missouri Bar's website:

As January's freezing temperatures grip Missouri, The Bahamas expect sunny skies and warm days, perfect for golf, shopping, relaxing on the beach, and sightseeing. Located near the capital city of Nassau and just a short hop from Florida, Atlantis is an exhilarating adventure of thrills and discoveries amidst the tropical splendor of the Caribbean. Take advantage of CLE in the morning, with afternoons and evenings free to enjoy all this paradise has to offer.

And in case you're wondering if they're serious about "CLE (continuing legal education) in the morning, yes, the latest they even offer seminars is 11:30.

Why is a Missouri quasi-governmental body channeling its dollars to The Bahamas? Why, at a time when it is working so hard to represent the best interests of the average Missourian through its defense of the Bar Plan, is the Missouri Bar leaving Missouri behind for an exclusive resort in The Bahamas?

The resort they are visiting is named Atlantis - after the mythical island that sunk into the sea. Perhaps the Missouri Bar will take the hint and sink this tradition of using its Mid-Winter meeting as an expensive tax deduction for its wealthiest members.

Missouri Plan II ought to be a commitment to hold Missouri Bar meetings in Missouri.

Symbolism Run Amock

Chiefs fans get free prostate cancer screenings tomorrow.

Recall?

Those who love irony will appreciate the fact that commenters over at Tony's Kansas City joke blog have begun to call for recall for the gang of 9 who, according to the commenters, ignored the Charter and gave an overpaid city manager a ten grand raise.

I still hold to the opinion that people who bluster about recall in KC are ignoranuses, but the irony was too rich to pass without comment.

Killing Kids and the Politics of Desperation

Matt Blunt is getting desperate, as he sees his once-bright political career ending as a single-term Governor who couldn't even thrive with an insanely partisan Republican legislature.

Going to the Republican playbook, he flipped to the Chapter entitled "Talk Tough On Crime - But Not White Collar Crime". Because he's been doing so badly in the public's eye, he decided to try to contrast his form of corruption with the lowest of the low - sex criminals. Even better - sex criminals who rape children!

Perfect! You cannot offend anyone by being tough on child rapists! It's foolproof!

On Thursday, Matt Blunt issued a call for the death penalty for child rapists.

Then he sat back waiting for the adulation that ought to come for a strong response to one of the most despicable crimes imaginable. True, some might complain that he's been in office for more than three years, and he's kind of late to realize that child rape is bad, but he could explain the delay away by claiming he accidentally deleted the emails about it. True, some people might view it as a little pathetic that our boy governor needs to reach so low to find someone with less popularity than him, but these are tough times.

So, in the deafening silence that resulted from his bold, politically courageous stand against child rape, who can blame him for the blank, confused expression that took over his face. Who can blame him for being shocked that instead of hearty applause and enthusiastic slaps on the back, people averted their eyes, or rolled them?

Finally, somebody leaned over and whispered in his ear. "Umm, Governor, they'll just kill the kids."

"What?!"

"If you give the death penalty for child rape, the rapists will have an extra incentive to kill the kids. Why leave a witness - often the only one?"

"You mean that my attempt to score cheap political points could mean that kids could get killed?"

"Exactly, Governor."

"Too bad. I need to look tough, so people will stop talking about how I lied about emails and fired Eckersley. If a few kids have to die, so be it. It's all about the polls . . ."

Such is the state of Governor Blunt these days. Let's hope he can't do too much more harm before Governor Jay Nixon takes over.

A New Kind of Lieutenant Governor - Dr. Sam Page

Earlier this week, I had the opportunity to sit down and chat one on one with Dr. Sam Page, the Democrat seeking the nomination to become the state's next Lieutenant Governor. We spent about an hour at the cafeteria at Truman Medical Center, a location he suggested when we found out that You Say Tomato is closed on Mondays. It turned out to be the perfect venue for Sam Page - the more you chat with Sam Page, the more you realize that he cares deeply for those in need, and is willing to do what needs doing.

The first thing I asked him was why in the world he wants to be Lieutenant Governor. Not exactly the sexiest of positions, the LG has traditionally been a parking place for some dependable partisan twit who isn't qualified for one of the more visible statewide positions. Sadly, our current LG fits into that mold.

Sam Page wants the position because he is freakishly well-qualified for it, and it fits into his approach toward public service - solid, substantive, and not flashy. It so happens that one of the important aspects of the LG office is to sit on 12 state commissions, 6 of which would benefit greatly by having an experienced physician on them. Similarly, Sam's 6 years of accomplishment as a legislator make him qualified to serve in the unique position of LG, the only office to formally bridge the Executive and Legislative branches.

As a candidate, Sam is also very attractive. He grew up in Van Buren, Missouri, spent much of his life in Kansas City (including medical school), and now lives in St. Louis County. He has substantial roots in both urban areas and outstate.

There are more exciting races to talk about right now, for positions that capture the imagination more than the LG office does. But, if you care about good, effective government in Missouri, no race presents a more obvious choice than Dr. Sam Page's campaign for Lieutenant Governor. Definitely plan on voting for him, and, even better, consider making a donation here.

Seems Unhinged

I wish I had some insight to offer about today's Council action, purporting to extend Cauthen's contract. Seems illegal to me, and it certainly seems like bad judgment. Seems like some people went way out of their way to be ugly today. Seems like they focused a whole lot more on vitriol and vengeance than on the good of the city.

I hope things aren't what they seem.

Koster the Imposter Brought Home the Bacon

CAFO is a word that you'll hear a lot more as the AG race heats up. CAFO is an acronym for Concentrated Animal Feeding Operation, more commonly known as a factory farm. They replace the image of farms we all grew up with with super-sized concentrations of pigs, jammed together in hideous conditions. I'm no PETA member, but even I don't like the idea of eating something that has spent its entire life jammed in a stinky stall like the most crowded and flatulent elevator you have ever imagined.

Setting aside any porcine pity or tenderness for tenderloins, though, CAFOs are huge canker sores on the environment. They pollute ground water with unimaginable quantities of pig feces and urine. Their smell can make your eyes water, or worse - airborne micro-particles of pig feces can pollute entire zones of beautiful Missouri countrysides.

Economical disaster mirrors the impact on quality of life. Corporate farms don't drive the pick-up to the local feed mill for supplies - they import vast quantities of whatever they need on shiny 18 wheelers without contributing positively to the local economy. CAFOs drive family farmers out of business, and towns disappear when there are no people to shop on Main Street.

Not surprisingly, local communities have sought to protect their towns and the Missouri landscape from these destructive behemoths. Much like the zoning laws that protected Koster when he was living in Hallbrook or in wealthy St. Louis suburbs, local controls are ways for the people of Missouri's towns to preserve their way of life and the towns they have grown up in.

Also not surprisingly, corporate interests have the money to buy legislative protection. Also not surprisingly, Chris Koster was for sale when he was a Republican Senator. He became so enthusiastic about CAFO and the wealthy donors that control them that he actually sponsored SB 364, mockingly entitled the Missouri Farm and Food Preservation Act.

What would SB 364 have done? It would have loosened environmental controls on these factory farms. Not tightened the controls to prevent the spread of disease and environmental damage, but actually loosen those controls, to enhance profits. It also would have prevented counties from controlling their own jurisdictions, ripping local control away from the locals and insisting that only state or federal regulations could be applied to CAFOs.

This is not some act of ancient history I dug out of the vaults - this happened this year, during the 2007 legislative session, while Koster was supposedly becoming a Democrat! Mere months ago, Koster was siding with corporate hog farms against small town Missourians in a classic Republican power play. Now he wants us to trust him?

Personally, I think that stinks like . . . a hog farm.

By the way, both Democrats in the race, Jeff Harris and Margaret Donnelly, opposed the CAFO bill.

Update: Terry Riley Proposes Keeping Cauthen, Converting Channel 2 to Travel Channel

Terry Riley is choosing to get out in front of the Cauthen termination. Alerted that Funkhouser has no intention of introducing an ordinance to retain City Manager Wayne Cauthen after disclosure of his wild and extravagant personal travel billed to the taxpayers, Riley is fighting back.

His plan is to convert cable Channel 2, currently devoted to City Government, to a new Travel Channel, to be called Wayne's World. In it, Wayne Cauthen will chat about his world travels paid for by the taxpayers.

They're still working on the concept, but the first shows will be airing soon -

"3 Days of 'Work', 4 Days of Play" - a recounting of the lavish trip to Victoria, British Columbia with his wife, at which he spent less than half of his weeklong, three grand trip attending a "conference".

"Mile High Club" - how to spend more than $1500 on a flight to DC.

"What the Halifax?" - spending $1400 on a trip with no further explanation than "business conference".

"River Walking on the Taxpayer" - sometimes, on the way back from DC, you feel the urge for some Tex-Mex, so why not make it a three-city trip for $1500, even if you have no other apparent reason to go to San Antonio?

There's much more in development, of course. The jaunt to Paris, the visit to Bourdeaux . . .

Some of the other City Council members are complaining that they weren't fully informed about the change in Cauthen's outlook. Of course, as a taxpayer, I wasn't fully informed about their desire to change Channel 2 into a travel channel, but I won't complain. Like them, I should have expected something to change when I picked up the Pitch . . .

Cauthen Loses Sweet Gig

Today, Funkhouser announced he won't let Cauthen keep his job. Last week, the Pitch reported, "Cauthen spent $32,163 on 23 trips between January 1, 2006, and October 8, 2007." A lot of that expense was incredibly shady.

Any questions?

Wise Thoughts on Faith, Politics and Party

This is just a small section of a long post, but it gives a flavor of the whole:

We've reached the point where Republican voters can claim the philosophy of absolute greed.

"I make a great deal of money through my own hard work. I don't want to pay for someone else's child to eat breakfast at school anymore."

Get that? She makes not just enough money, but a "great deal of money." How dare anyone take it away for something so frivolous as feeding a poor child? And yet Republicans, through their actions in blurring the lines between church and state, have become the "party of faith." Because they say so. Because they are bold in their actions and snarling in their defense.

We need to be just as adamant. We need to not hide behind any abstraction or evasion. We need to be unafraid to address this voter and say "I am going to take some of your money, and give it to that poor kid, because it's more important -- both to the child and to society -- that he eat, rather than that you have an extra week in Cabo."

Note that we should not pretend that "a program will take your money." Or "the government will take your money." This is a democracy, and we are the government. I will take your money. I will. Some of that money you worked hard for and want to keep. I will give it to a kid who is hungry. If your concern is that poverty should be addressed by individuals, then there's a simple solution: feed him. If there are no poor children needing food, I won't have to take anything for them. If your position is that people would be more generous if only the government would stay out of it, then sorry. I'm not willing to put this child at risk to as part of your experiment. Besides, if that were true, then why were their more hungry kids before we started these programs to give them a little breakfast? If your position is that your being able to keep all your money is more important than a child being fed, then I simply think you're wrong. And sick. You want to keep that money? You better beat me at the polls.

There's much, much more there to read and think about.

Funk's First 7 Months - a balanced perspective

A few commenters have asked my perspective on the first several months of Mark Funkhouser's administration. I've been tempted to avoid the request, because there is a vicious, vociferous gang of critics who have lost the ability to modulate their outrage at Mark and anyone who does not advocate public flogging for him. In typing this post, I realize that my motives, my rationality and probably my lineage will be attacked by anonymous commenters. But I hate to let the bullies silence a balanced perspective, so here goes.

Addressing the Big Issues:

First off, it's impressive that we're talking about big issues. No previous mayor has done such a forthright job of focusing attention on an agenda of major issues, rather than jumping between issues du jour. It's right there on his business card: Council, Finance, Downtown, Neighborhoods, Housing, Education, Crime, Sewers, Transit and Citizen Satisfaction.

By focusing on those issues, Funk and the council stand a chance of making lasting, systemic improvements rather than applying bandaids to the papercuts that happen along the way. His attention to the council has allowed him to lead as the first among equals, and achieve a majority on the votes that he needs. I am NOT claiming that Mark is buddy-buddy with the entire council, but I am happy to see that he's found ways of achieving concensus by focusing on common interests.

Finance is where Mark is likely to achieve his most important impact on KC. Let's face it, very few citizens and only a few city hall denizens really "get" city finances. Our prior mayor gave money out to clients of her friends like she had a printing press in the basement. Funk's job is to restore a sense of discipline and to find a way to pay the bills. In gaining passage of the Economic Development and Incentive Policy, Funk and the council have at least defined a rational set of policies. Now, if we can stick to it, we might begin to build our way out of our predicament. When you're in a hole, stop digging - Mark has stopped the digging.

Downtown was underway long before Mark took office, and it would be dishonest to claim its success or failure thus far depends on him. One telling anecdote about his character came in the handling of the Hannah Montana ticket shortage. Rather than taking the politically expedient route toward popularity and slamming AEG for not making more tickets available, he met with Brenda Tinnen, the Sprint Center General Manager, and learned what a good job she is doing. He wound up working with her and developing a positive relationship that can only help downtown succeed. By eschewing cheap political points, he helped KC and downtown stay on the road to success.

Neighborhoods and Housing, specifically on the East Side, have been a focus of Mark's tenure. The overwhelming passage of the Sales Tax Renewal was due to the shift in money to the neighborhoods. He is quietly and effectively directing the focus of the city to neighborhood support. Most recently, he appointed Alexander Ellison to the Citizen Advisory Committee on Housing Policy, to work on developing housing policies for the city. It's almost embarrassing that Mark gets to claim credit for moving the city toward a more engaged response to the declining housing stock in our city, but such is the history of neglect toward the impoverished in KC.

Funk's coming Educational Summit will be an attempt to assess where we are and find positive areas of common agreement in educating Kansas City's children. Here is an issue that Mayors have historically taken a "free pass", since they do not control any of the dozen plus school districts that educate Kansas City's children. "That's not my job, talk to the school board" has been the historical response of prior mayors, but Funk is seeking to engage and provide some positivity. At the very least, the TIF policy has slowed the redirection of tax money from the schools and into the hands of real estate developers.

Crime is another area where the Mayor's role is limited. He has a seat on the Police Board, which Mark has taken seriously, but, in all honesty, I'd have to give him a grade of "incomplete" on this issue. Light rail, economic development, housing, education - these are all important issues which could have an impact on crime in Kansas City, but there's been no breakthrough or major development regarding crime in Kansas City.

What kind of a Mayor lists sewers on the back of his card as a priority? Our declining infrastructure requires that we begin work on upgrading our sewers, but most mayors have preferred attending ribbon cuttings than working on this non-sexy issue. Mark and the council have formed a Water Services Utility Funding Task Force to assist the Water Department in coming up with solutions, but it's going to be a long process. Again, hurray for getting us onto the right path, even though he hasn't solved the problems by a long shot.

Regarding Transit, the big issue is light rail in Kansas City. Despite the efforts of some naysayers to claim Mark is somehow against light rail in Kansas City, Mark has successfully guided the council toward repealing the misguided Chastain plan, and is working on leading us toward a regional plan. Regardless of whether such a plan is going to get approval in Topeka and Jefferson City, we will make real progress toward mass transit in Kansas City during his first term. By the end of 2008, we'll have a real plan, and that will be a huge success that has eluded this city for way too many years.

Finally, on Citizen Satisfaction, people are enthusiastic about Kansas City again. Parking has worked out for the Sprint Center. Mark has held numerous public forums, and listened and responded to average citizens in a way that would have frightened our upper-class prior Mayor. Listening to citizens who are not heavily involved in Municipal Government, I hear good things and a lot of evidence that Mark is viewed as a champion of "regular folks".

Listening to insiders and the people who are accustomed to arranging high-dollar TIF with a phone call to the Mayor's office, I hear a lot of dissatisfaction, which, frankly, pleases me. I had the pleasure of listening to a TIF lawyer from one of the large firms in Kansas City complain that "the process is so much tougher now." Awwww. I've heard arrogant "leaders" in a tizzy about a gossip column interviewing the Mayor's wife. I've seen bloggers devote literally hundreds of posts to slinging whatever mud can be found or imagined, and I've noticed the slackening amount of attention those posts draw. I've seen "savvy insiders" get exposed as blustering fools by huffing about schemes like "recall". In short, I've seen the people who fought hard to defeat a populist candidate complain that they're stuck having to deal with a populist Mayor.

Stumbles Along the Way:

No balanced perspective on Funkhouser's first 7 months can ignore the stumbles along the way. Though they seem kind of petty compared to the progress on major issues discussed above, Mark has given the nattering nabobs of negativity too much material to chatter about.

The Semler appointment should never have been made. In appointing a wonderful new Parks Board, chaired by the superb pick of John Fierro, Mark failed to fully vet Frances Semler, a rose-growing grandmother from the Northland who seemed harmless enough until her views on things other than parks and roses seized the spotlight. I still argue that Semler is a less pernicious appointment than Tim Kristl was, but that's a form of amoral relativism.

All told, though, it's kind of encouraging that the major strike against Funk after 7 months is one appointment to a board that, prior to that appointment, would have drawn a blank stare from all but the most insanely informed citizen if asked to name a single member. It's been a pretty darned good run thus far, and there are signs that Mark is growing in the sort of instinct necessary to avoid the sort of gaffes that get the perennially petty so worked up.

Looking Forward:

I've heard Mark compared to Jesse Ventura, and, while the analogy is intended to be insulting, I don't think it's totally inept. Both come from outside the usual breeding stables for political candidates, and both won with creative and populist campaigns pitted against a stagnant political elite. Both "politicians" have a tendency to step in "it" on occasion, and neither seems convinced that their highest priority ought to be avoiding controversy.

Ventura, of course, decided against running for a second term in the face of an increasingly negative political outlook. It turned out he was all style, and no substance.

Funkhouser presents the flip side of that coin. Mark is all substance, and very little style. It turned out that his quirky campaign and odd charisma eked out a victory over Same Old Same Old. Now, he is in a position to do the work he really wants to do. He's managing to get legislation passed. He's managing to keep focus on the big issues in our city. He hasn't been so seduced by a shiny soccer stadium at Bannister that he is willing to give away the Super-TIF farm (can you imagine how Kay would have gushed in her hurry to put on her ribbon-cutting outfit?), though he is working toward making it happen.

I'll go ahead and issue a prediction here. Mark will be reelected in 2011 by a margin greater than Barnes' 60-40 trouncing of Stan Glazer. He'll do so by continuing his dedication toward real improvement in our city, and by his constant contact with the voters of Kansas City. He won't be a stranger reintroducing himself after a four-year absence - he'll be a familiar (and distinctive) face they'll recognize from dozens of community forums and appreciate for his common sense focus on making the city work for them.

At least that is what it looks like at this point in time. There's a whole lot that can and will happen between now and then. So far, so good.

Next Blogger Group Activity?

I want to play this at the nearest library. Think it would get me kicked out?

How Will the History be Written?

In 408 days, the Bush presidency will end. (That is, barring some wild Cheney/Rove spasm of historical exceptionalism, on a scale beyond even the Supreme Court appointment that marked the beginning of the regime.) And, we will blink in the dawn of a new era, wondering what in the hell that was about. And the Bush regime will begin to be placed into historical context.

Ironically, the proverb "History is written by the victors" has many attributions, reflecting the uncertainty and even falsity of much we accept as "history". A few more colossal military screw-ups, and our greatest President may have been recorded as the final and most inept President of the formerly United States. "What if" games can lead to all kinds of altered visions, with history's villains triumphant, and history's heroes vilified.

But the process of assessing presidents in the popular mind is far less binary. Nixon has become a paranoid, flawed master of foreign policy. Reagan is widely viewed as a dim-witted simpleton with a sunny smile who surrounded himself with corrupt thugs (though a few hold-outs still remember him as "morning in America"). Kennedy, well, heck, you can't even mention him in some circles without genuflecting, though serious study reveals a far less saintly Jack.

A common theme in presidential assessments is that truly negative views cannot hold. As Americans, we cannot stomach the thought that one of our leaders was actually a bad person. As noted above, even Nixon, who resigned when he hit the depths of disapproval to which Bush has sunk, has gained a more generous stature than anyone thought possible when he left office. At the time, he was a slimy, despicable crook, but now he has risen to a competent president with a flair for talking with the Chinese, whose fatal flaw was too much concern about being reelected.

The truth is that W needs an upgrade in reputation. The truth is, grade school students in 2050 aren't going to look at the large sheet of oval portraits, focus on Bush (he may attract attention for being the last in that consecutive string of white males) and learn what really happened. No teacher is going to stand there and say "At the turn of the Century, Democrats fell under the control of a bunch of incompetent, gutless party leaders, and the Republicans fell under the spell of the Christian right, and the voters elected Gore, but the Supreme Court preferred Bush, the war-criminal, who soon launched one understandable war and then one inexcusable, evil debacle that destroyed our country's standing in the world."

America in 2050 will not believe how bad Bush has been. We, as a country, need to believe that our path has been righteous, and always toward the light. We even gloss over the Spanish-American War these days, as a 6 month adventure in helping other countries gain their independence from Old Europe. In a few more years, the Bay of Pigs will either drop entirely out of mainstream history books, or be upgraded to a valiant effort that inspired the Cubans to hold on for another 50 years until Castro died.

My imagination fails me as to how we can remake W, though. He launched a brutal, bloody war against a country that had not attacked us and posed no threat to us, reprising the role of Hirohito. He gave us secret prisons and people "disappearing", ripping a page out of what we had thought was Stalin's playbook. He made us torturers, and rendered the Geneva Conventions "quaint", drawing from the Pol Pot genre. He accepted a presidency that wasn't his to accept, in the best tradition of tin-horn third-world "presidents". He played guitar while New Orleans drowned, like a modern-era Nero. How do we cobble together an acceptable portrait out of this historical Frankenstein of ill-chosen parts?

My suspicion and hope is that Bush will be remembered in the manner of Lyndon Johnson - a kind of forgotten war-time president whose focus was on a war he couldn't win or end. We'll have to forget that, unlike Johnson, Bush started his war, and chose it with an eagerness that led him to skew intelligence. We'll have to forget a whole lot about Bush.

It's going to be a slow, painful process to forget about Bush. Forgiveness of the person, of course, is going to be beyond the ability of many of us, but fixing what he has done to us will be difficult enough that it will provide plenty of distractions.

Some will read this and complain that it's not fair that Bush will get off lightly for his misdeeds. I agree - he's a war-criminal and an uncaring leader serving the interests of the wealthy. But history has never been a fair and just narrative. It's about creating a story we can live with. America will not be able to live with the truth of George W. Bush. In 400 days, we must begin to reinvent him.

Why Do Russ Johnson, Ed Ford & Jan Marcason Hate Kansas City Voters?

They don't, of course, they're simply doing a good job of listening to and exploring all ideas by meeting with an engineer to talk about the feasibility of a subway in Kansas City. And, while I think the idea is a crazy one, I appreciate their effort in checking out the engineer's boring pipe dream.

I'll be curious, though, to see if they get accused of arrogance, conspiracy to oppose the will of Kansas City voters, and a secret agenda to keep light rail out of Kansas City for their effort. I hope not - like the Mayor, they are good public servants looking out for what is best for our city and region.

Blogger Appreciation: The Corporate Blogs

It took a while, but the Pitch and the Star have finally developed good blogs. I've had fun criticizing the Star's blog in its past incarnations, but it's only fair to acknowledge that both of our major newspapers are running pretty decent blogs.

There's more of a tension in running a blog for a newspaper than you might think. It's not just a matter of opening a comments section on your newspaper's web page. Should different editorial standards apply? Should reporters have the opportunity to state their opinions more clearly on a blog, outside of "straight reporting"?

Most importantly, how does the money work? Both the Pitch and the Star are newspapers owned by corporations that exist to deliver money to shareholders. Everything they do needs to be understood in the context of making money. How can they participate in a medium that is dominated by volunteers?

The Prime Buzz has become a gathering place for Kansas City's politicos and wannabes. It regularly features tomorrow's editorials today, and a lot of little stories that don't make it into ink. One thing I appreciate is their daily round-up of what political bloggers are posting about - it's a generous tip of the hat to the rest of the bloggers, and establishes the Prime Buzz as a collaborator instead of a competitor.

I don't know how the money works for the Prime Buzz. There isn't any advertising going on at the site. For a while, they tried charging a huge amount of money for a password to the site. The results were utterly predictable, and I have no idea what they were thinking. They should have paid me a fat consulting fee and I could have saved them a lot of time and embarrassment.

Perhaps they justify the time and expense as a way to stay relevant. It certainly does accomplish that goal. The Prime Buzz IS the talk of the political blogging world, and everyone interested in politics keeps a close eye on it. The blogging world does best when it has a sense of community - one or several sites that everyone follows. The Kansas City blogging world had that for a while in the form of a volunteer blogger, but has lacked one since that site diminished in traffic, commentary and creativity. The Prime Buzz is now providing that service for the political world.

The Pitch's Plog is more brash, more fun, and less focused than the Prime Buzz. It doesn't deliver nearly as many posts as the Prime Buzz, and it hasn't developed a fraction of the number of commenters. But it includes a bunch of posts that don't make it into print, and gave me yesterday's great news about Chefburger.

The Plog does have advertising, and a fairly "noisy" layout because of the advertising, but I think it will develop into a more promin ent voice in the blogging world if it continues to deliver the quirky and telling anecdotes the Pitch staff uncovers on their way to the feature stories for the paper.

My only suggestion would be that it could generate more traffic for itself and others if it mentioned some of the other local blogs in its content. Yesterday, Tony's KC included a claim that the Plog had "cannibalized" one of his posts because they both happened to mention that the Star had published "happy talk" about the Sprint Center. While I understand why the Pitch would be miffed at the silly accusation (criticizing the Star and the Sprint Center is not exactly breaking new ground), they probably ought to have gone ahead and responded, to give him some of the attention he was seeking. While some might hesitate to reward bad behavior, Tony could tell you that blogger beefs are good for traffic.

Kander Newsletter

Jason Kander has another newsletter out. He's running a good, solid campaign, and I'm looking forward to him representing the 44th District in Jefferson City.

Tell Me Lies, Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

Yesterday morning, I heard a fascinating interview of Lou Dobbs on KKFI, during which the Democracy Now staff confronted him with his own lies about immigration. Yesterday evening, I dealt with a commenter who produced three separate absolute, disprovable lies in the course of one thread. In short, I had two views into the alternative universe yesterday, where truth is a minor annoyance and new facts can be invented as needed.

Last night, I got mad. This morning, I'll get even.

One of the techniques used by Dobbs is to have some half-baked reference as a source for a lie. When he reports that 7,000 new cases of leprosy have been reported in the US during the last 3 years, he "relies" on a "study" by an insane person who makes stuff up. Well, why should the right wing have all the fun? Just for today, I'll be the insane person on the left that just makes stuff up. To use these "facts" in arguments, though, I recommend that you refer to me as "a respected researcher", "a distinguished historian", or "a highly-regarded scientist". I'm all those things, of course. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Here are a few facts for you to use to win arguments and impress people:

1. 78% of the world's wealth was created during the Clinton years, and the world's wealth has declined by 24% during the Bush Administration.

2. Half of all undocumented persons are medical researchers, working quietly and humbly in labs to invent cures for diabetes, heart disease, and gingivitus.

3. In a secret speech delivered to the US Chamber of Commerce on October 13, 2005, Dick Cheney stated, "The Missouri Plan is the single most important safeguard to keep people free from corporate dominance, and so we must destroy it."

4. 95.3% of the voters who approved the Chastain Plan actually thought they were voting in favor of a regional light rail plan.

5. A comprehensive study of thousands of adult men conducted jointly by the Mayo Clinic and Harvard University Medical School discovered that drinking homebrew is good for you, and what is commonly called a "beer belly" is, in reality, the body's storage system for wisdom and B vitamins.

If you need any facts for your arguments, just email me, and I will create them for you. It's so much easier this way.

Good Burgers for Power & Light?

One of my fears for the Power & Light district has been that it will be exactly the same as every other developed downtown I've visited, utterly without local flavor. I remember wandering Denver's plastic 16th Street Mall once, and asking a couple where I could get a great Denver meal. "There's a New York Cheesecake Factory up a block or two," they gushed, "but if you don't want to wait, there's an Applebee's around the corner."

Welcome to Anywhere.

Yesterday, though, Eric Barton of the Pitch gave me hope. He reported on the Plog that Rob Dalzell will be opening a place called Chefburger in the district. Dalzell is responsible for 3 bright spots in Kansas City's food world - 1924 Main, Souperman and Pizza Bella, so that's good news in and of itself. Eric Barton notes, however, that Dalzell brings his burger mojo from Taylor’s Automatic Refresher in St. Helena, California.

Barton reports that he ate at Taylor's Automatic Refresher the day after eating at the French Laundry, perhaps the most sought-after meal in the food world. While Barton gives the French Laundry its props, he claims that his burger at Taylor's was equally memorable.

t wasn’t any secret ingredient that it made it so damn good, just a freshly baked egg bun; crisp veggies; a special sauce that I think was just Thousand Island dressing; and one fat, perfectly cooked patty. It came wrapped in paper, and we got onion rings and sweet-potato fries on the side.

We can only hope that Dalzell will be bringing some of that James-Beard-Award-Winning burger magic to Kansas City. Barton has single-handedly raised my hopes for the Power & Light District.

10 Pounds of Food & Pryde's Old Westport

Think, for a second, about the dual role of food here in Kansas City. For many of us, it is a frequent focus of pleasure. We amuse ourselves with new tastes, we accompany it with great beverages, we present it attractively, and we consume it with great friends.

For others, it's a frequent source of concern. If you're out of money and your kids need to be fed, or if you're homebound and the kitchen is bare, food is not pleasure - it is survival. While people don't often starve to death in Kansas City, children, seniors and people trying to get their lives on track regularly go without proper nutrition. Every single day. Thousands of them.

Two worlds.

One of Kansas City's best local foodie shops, Pryde's of Westport, is offering a couple easy bridges between those worlds.

First, and easiest, here's a coupon, where they'll donate $5 to the Bishop Sullivan Center if you spend $25, plus, you get a free pound of their coffee. If you're going there, please use the coupon!

Second, and almost as easy, Pryde's will donate 10 pounds of food to the Bishop Sullivan Center if you go here and give them your name and email. I did it and it didn't trigger a flood of spam, so, really, why not invest a few seconds of your time and help get 10 pounds of food to someone who needs it?

Pryde's is a great store - their selection of kitchen gadgets and foodie stuff is better and more thoughtful than Williams-Sonoma or any of the other corporate chains, their shop is quirky and fun to explore, and their location is great. The fact that they are such great, compassionate corporate citizens makes it even more satisfying to shop there.

Trouble with the Treasurer

If you're coming here for inside skinny on Funkhouser's appointment of Gloria to serve as Campaign Treasurer, I'm sorely lacking. But the facts on the table are sufficient to spark some thoughts.

This is another classic Funkhouser dust-up. I am completely capable of arguing that this is no big deal. It's not, really. The campaign treasurer position is highly public, and, as Mark mentioned in the Star's article, people will have the opportunity to examine every detail of every transaction. Also, it's a stop-gap, temporary thing, during a time when the campaign isn't going to be raising or spending much money at all. No big deal. No blood, no foul. Sure, it looks a little bad, but don't be ridiculous - nothing bad is going to happen.

And, really, the people screaming loudest are performing their typical roles. Some hysterical commenter has started shouting about racketeering, and claiming that Funk has contempt for the people of Kansas City. It's tempting to argue in favor of the decision solely to poke the easy holes in the logic and language of commenters like those, and to distance myself from their sloppy, strident silliness.

My ego enjoys the sport of swatting fools (it's so darned easy!), and my stubbornness inclines me to launch the best valid defense available - which is, as argued above, that it's no big deal.

So, it's all laid out in front of us, and we all know our appointed roles. I'll be cool and logical and perhaps a bit defensive, and a few commenters (you know who you are) will be all over the place, making unsubstantiated claims and crazy leaps in logic. If that's what you came here for, I've laid it out already above, so have at it.

But I'm having some difficulty playing my part this time with any sincerity. Maybe it's a cold coming on. Maybe it's the sense of deja vu. Maybe, even though I am fully capable of explaining it away, the appearance of this particular problem is just a little too jarring for my explanation to bring me complete satisfaction. Really, if a good man like Evert Asjes resigns because of problems with payments involving Gloria, replacing him with Gloria might not be the best solution.

Surely there ought to be somebody, anybody, else. If Jeff Simon (the deputy treasurer, and one of the most ethical and clear thinking people in the city) was too busy with his work and family, they ought to have been able to find someone else. It concerns me deeply that there's nobody else around to step in.

But I've seen the damage done by the harping and attacking by the constant critics. It seems like the Funkhousers are relying only on each other. In her gossip column interview, Gloria said "What my husband lacks, I make up for," and asked "where do I begin and Funk ends?" I notice an absence there - an absence of other people. The "kitchen cabinet" hasn't met for a while, and has no meetings scheduled. If rumors are true, good, old friends are alienated. While it's understandable to circle the wagons when under attack by constant, thoughtless, unfair, vicious critics, but it seems like we're headed toward having only one wagon, and only two people on it.

I appreciate the motivation behind Gloria's involvement. I don't think it's bad that she plays a role in the Mayor's office. The Mayor's office is not a one-person shop. Unfortunately, it's not a two-person job, either. It's a team job, just like the campaign was. It's time to start bringing in some new people, or reconnecting with old people.

Appointing Gloria to be campaign treasurer looks bad, though I can argue that it's not. But allowing your circle to shrink so small that you have to turn to Gloria is bad, and has me deeply concerned.

Local Firm Joins With My Twin to Help New Orleans

This is a neat story. Brad Pitt and other philanthropists have joined with a group of architects, including local firm BNIM Architects, to design houses for the Lower 9th Ward in New Orleans. If you want to give a Christmas gift to someone who really needs it, you might consider visiting the Make it Right website.

Good Shift at Harvesters

Undeterred by alarmist predictions of freezing rain and sleet, around 15 bloggers and friends showed up at Harvesters to work a shift. For a few hours, we sorted and packed 20 pound bozes of skin and body care products, 25 pound boxes of hair care products, 10 pound boxes of feminine hygiene products, 20 pound boxes of dental care products, and 10 pound boxes of over the counter stuff, the miscellaneous category.

If you've never been out there, it's a heck of an operation. In a nutshell, they take you and your group to a huge stack of items, tell you how they want it sorted, packed and labeled, give you supplies and set you loose. It looked like hard work for those who weren't making labels, but we got through loads of stuff, making it ready for distribution to agencies that will use it to help our poor.

After the work, we got a complete tour of the facility and watched an inspiring video. It helped place our work into context, and made sore muscles feel more purposeful.

Then there was the beer, brats, pizza, pumpkin pie, cookies and conversation at the gonemild household. While I greatly enjoy her company, I'm thankful that M. Toast left before her Sooners started whipping my Tigers.

It was a very good time, working with other bloggers and accomplishing something worthwhile. If you have a group that needs an activity, I highly recommend spending a shift there. And, if you'd prefer not to be quite so active, participate in one of their fundraising drives or drop off some canned good in one of the barrels at the grocery stores. Maybe the bloggers will show up and sort them again sometime.

Well-Played, Mayor's Office

I was surprised to see that Hearne Christopher scored the interview with everybody's favorite target for talk, Gloria Squitiro. Surely, given the incessant chatter among city hall gossips about the First Lady, the interview should have gone to one of the more serious people at the Star . . .

Upon reflection, though, it seems absolutely perfect that those who choose to focus on the sideshows of negativity while ignoring the strengths and accomplishments of the Funkhouser administration are now chattering about a freaking gossip columnist. It's a not-so-subtle clue that those who salivate at the thought of slamming Squitiro are simple-minded, frivolous gossips.

For an administration that gets accused (by those same people) of a lack of sophistication, I think we just saw a masterwork of putting the issue onto the proper agenda.

Bravo!

Failure, Kind of

Back in October, I brashly claimed "I Can Do This" and set out to write a 50,000 word novel in the month of November, as part of NaNoWriMo.

It's now December, and I have about 10,000 words.

Despite the apparent failure, I've got 4 good characters, a setting, a plot, and a start. I'm going to finish it. But not in November.