Killing Kids and the Politics of Desperation

Matt Blunt is getting desperate, as he sees his once-bright political career ending as a single-term Governor who couldn't even thrive with an insanely partisan Republican legislature.

Going to the Republican playbook, he flipped to the Chapter entitled "Talk Tough On Crime - But Not White Collar Crime". Because he's been doing so badly in the public's eye, he decided to try to contrast his form of corruption with the lowest of the low - sex criminals. Even better - sex criminals who rape children!

Perfect! You cannot offend anyone by being tough on child rapists! It's foolproof!

On Thursday, Matt Blunt issued a call for the death penalty for child rapists.

Then he sat back waiting for the adulation that ought to come for a strong response to one of the most despicable crimes imaginable. True, some might complain that he's been in office for more than three years, and he's kind of late to realize that child rape is bad, but he could explain the delay away by claiming he accidentally deleted the emails about it. True, some people might view it as a little pathetic that our boy governor needs to reach so low to find someone with less popularity than him, but these are tough times.

So, in the deafening silence that resulted from his bold, politically courageous stand against child rape, who can blame him for the blank, confused expression that took over his face. Who can blame him for being shocked that instead of hearty applause and enthusiastic slaps on the back, people averted their eyes, or rolled them?

Finally, somebody leaned over and whispered in his ear. "Umm, Governor, they'll just kill the kids."

"What?!"

"If you give the death penalty for child rape, the rapists will have an extra incentive to kill the kids. Why leave a witness - often the only one?"

"You mean that my attempt to score cheap political points could mean that kids could get killed?"

"Exactly, Governor."

"Too bad. I need to look tough, so people will stop talking about how I lied about emails and fired Eckersley. If a few kids have to die, so be it. It's all about the polls . . ."

Such is the state of Governor Blunt these days. Let's hope he can't do too much more harm before Governor Jay Nixon takes over.